Dear Diary,
Since I have nothing much to blog today, I decided to blog a random post which do come across my mind from time to time.
Frankly, I am not fanciful yet petty when it comes to choosing Mr. Prince and I don't have high expectations like wanting diamonds or sunshine because I know what relationship are made of. There are regular ups and downs which are filled with sweet and sour moments.
But of course like any other person there are the Do's and Don'ts that you expect of Mr. Prince.
The DO's
A simple princess, I am quite easy to please, well
minus PMS. I don't expect to be showered with expensive gifts nor expensive treats during special occasion or even on normal days. But that does not mean I don't expect anything. A
LITTLE gestures like giving me a 'Good Morning/Good Night' text or a Birthday Wish on Facebook etc, showing effort of remembrance will make me the most happiest girl ever.
I don't expect him to bring me to any posh restaurants or expensive dining nor outings when we go out. But I do
expect SOME of his time just to spend it with me. Just going for a short walk & chit-chatting or dining at any cheap hawker centres would mean the world to me.
You have to understand that
dollars & cents cannot buy me, cannot buy my love. You can be the richest kid on earth but that does not mean you can win me over and thinking that just by spending pennies on me, it would make me fall for you. You can be stone broke but if I feel sincerity and honesty when I'm with you, it is already enough for me. Unlike some other girls, I value sincerity than monetary.
Having
a job and being responsible. I don't need him to earn thousands over dollars or even millions for me but if he does, Alhamdulilah. All I need is for him to have a job. It doesn't matter if he earns so much lesser than me but having a sense of responsibility over me and my family ensuring that he works hard, makes me feel secure.
Yes, I do not wish to repeat the same cycle living in difficulty over financial wise, but if that is how fate is written for me, I am not afraid. I wasn't born a silver spoon either, it was hard-up for me when I was young. I remember I couldn't even afford to buy myself a $10 school shoe and end up wearing them even when they got holes all over. I remember how it used to get soaking wet during rainy days and I had to wear slipper before changing back to my school shoes during rainy days. But you know what? I gain a lot of values and I am not ashamed to say. It was this, that drove me to be determined in life, to always do well in school, to be well-driven and strive for the best because I wanted to help my family. I know the value of money and I never take it for granted. I learn to save, save a lot and save so much and was not spendthrift. If this is the price that I have to pay for my children, why not.
Comfortability. Someone that I am comfortable with. Someone whom I can talk about anything and everything under the sun and I know he listens not because he is just pretending to do so but because he cares and he
loves listening to me. Someone I can share my stories, even the worst thing about me and not afraid he will judge me. Someone who gives suggestion and advice and not criticize me. Someone whom I am comfortable to appear my normal self, even without a teeny bit of make-up on or if I do have break-outs which I feel so embarrassed to go out but he can still look at me the same. More of feeling safe and the comfort when I'm with him.
A plus point to me if he
practice and is knowledgeable in rules of Islam to carry and bring my family & I towards the rightfully path, His path. I don't need him to be super duper religious, which I don't quite fancy as well but I need someone would at least pray when he has the time, pray together as a family, go to the mosque with me during the fasting month for terawih, perform his Friday prayers, I would not mind going for a religious talk together, someone who fast during the fasting month etc. Just like how a normal Muslim individual would.
Last but not least, is
Chemistry.
Love is blind and the most complicated things which I cannot even deny up till now. Sometimes a guy has all the quality that you have been looking for or even so much better than what you have looked for but if there isn't any chemistry between you and him, you can never force yourself to like or be with him and neither can he force you to be. To me, chemistry is important, because it is like some kind of connection that you feel when you are with him or even that very first moment when you saw/meet him. It is some kind of attraction that you have for one another, that just captivates the both of you together. Sometimes even the impossible becomes possible. For instance, people whom speak bad English turns you off and you tell yourself you will never be with this kind of person, but you happened to meet with one that you have some kind of chemistry with, that bad English becomes something so cute to you that you can giggle about and no longer an issue. You feel me? I bet you do.
The DON'Ts
Even though there are things that turns you off and could change your mind to like it over time. But there are still things that I would not tolerate and would not change to like it as I grow with time.
I call these the basic.
Smoking, drinking & clubbing. You do these 3, I won't even have a second look. I am not looking down on people who does this. It's your choice, it's between you & Allah. But I just cannot imagine, if you cannot avoid yourself doing this, I don't know how you would be able to carry yourself in the future especially when you have children or in what way will you be able to guide me and the family. Would you even be able to stop? Now, that's another thing.
"Selling" himself or even trying to impress. Boasting around about all the good things about your life, your good quality especially when I do not even ask, makes me want to vomit, literally. I will find out about your good quality when I'm with you, you don't have to tell me. And you have to remember, I'm a very competitive person, so whatever you think you can achieve, I'll make sure I do it so that I will remain on the same par as you. Even if I don't have it, I'll do anything that it takes. Driving license? To get a degree? and etc. Checked! Sorry, I wasn't trying to show off but you boasted.
Yes, I
love fancy fairy tales but I don't need anyone
trying too hard to win me. You end up becoming pushy trying to "rush/force" me into a relationship which I am barely even comfortable with, like "Why are you so obsessed with me?!" kind of thingy. I don't want an engross someone to go head over heels on me. It gives me the goosebumps. I am a normal person, some pictures you look pretty, most pictures I am not. Of course it's really sweet and nice when someone tells you that you look beautiful but not constantly praising you, praising your every picture. Like seriously? Enough already. And appearing at my void decks just to give me "surprises" just because I did not reply your text or pestering in asking me out despite me not wanting, makes me so scared than yearn.
Forcing me to like into things that he likes which I do not. If the things that I like, isn't any of his liking, it's fine with me. I mean it will be nice if we try to like each other's liking but forcing won't help because some things can never be force upon. Like forcing me to eat nuts & cheese. Are you nuts? I can't do it. I'll do the same for you, you do the same for me.
I
love sports. I
love my running, I
love swimming, I
love my abs work-outs etc. I don't know if sturdy is the right choice of word to use but something along that line. I don't need him to do all these, neither do I expect him to have abs. I don't really fancy guys with abs anyway. But I prefer someone who is rather
tough and firm when he carry himself, like a man. Lol! I
don't like lembik guys, it turns me off. Because I am already so aggressive myself, being with a
lembik guy makes me think, who is the guy, who is the girl now? Zzz! And especially, do not act cute. Guys acting cute, seriously, oh my God! I WILL DIE.
Sensitive and drawing the line. There are certain things that
you can say or you better not say especially when we don't have any kind of chemistry yet. You don't tell me to watch my diet or talk about how I have put on weight and how I should do this exercise to lose weight blah blah blah. It's disrespectful because it makes me think, Have you been observing my body?! My weight, I watch it myself. Even to any other woman out there, weight is sensitive issue to talk about especially if you ain't close to that person.
And you don't call me sweet cute names like sugar pie or honey bee when we are not an item. This is a
major turn off to me and I cannot cannot cannot stand it. Just a gentle reminder, when we are not an item together. So am I. I am not a food. Not a sugar, not a pie and I am not an insect either, not a bee definitely. My name is Azie, so get it right.
To me, learning to draw the line is most important thing. You don't do this when you only get to know someone just yesterday. You thought you had the chemistry but she might not. Sure, we can come to this one day, calling each other sweet names, shortcake, pumpkin, babylove and advicing on each other's body kind of thingy BUT only when we are more comfortable and have the
chemistry.
Till here. I have said my point.
And honestly, if you are a**hole who wishes to destroy woman's life and not because you are serious with her. You can jolly well jump down and kill yourself. Because why? You moron don't deserve to live in this world. Okay bye.
XOXO,
I have never imagine few years back this is how Allah SWT have written my life, fate to be. 
