Tok Kadi, I choose you!

Dear Diary,

*Kadi name will is bold in this entry.

This time D and I had to get our ROMM registration done because I had to pass a copy of my ROMM approval letter to my Town Council before they come chasing after me or if they revoke my booking of my wedding venue. Frankly, I didn't know that choosing a kadi will somehow be this "hard" for us, especially when you are the kind who don't know which kadi is who and which kadi you actually like or prefer. Lol! I mean I recognize some of the kadi faces but I don't know their name, and the only Kadi's name I know is Pasuni Bin Maulan but I don't know how he looks like because he was the one that did the solemnization of Mama & Ayah. Heeeee!

Initially, we thought it will be easy since D's uncle knew one of the Kadi, Nor Razak Bin Bakar whom did the solemnization of D's brother, Sadiq & Maria, 2 years ago. D's parents even said they will help us settle the 'looking for the kadi' part. So, I thought it was one burden off my chest since I don't have to go around looking for kadi to marry me off. Lol!  But the true struggle happened when we wanted to register our ROMM, (not sure) but I think it's probably a new thing now. I guess last time you probably have to book & "outsource" for your own kadi, call them and ask them yourselves but now they have drop down tab like this,

This is just a list of almost all the kadi without choosing the preferred date.

asking us to make a choice in deciding which kadi we want during our solemnization day. So different kadi is available at different date, different timing base on their availability. D and I tried to skip choosing the kadi part (since we wanted Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar) and just click 'confirm' with the registration but they don't allow us to do that. And strangely, Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar block off all his calendar dates that we couldn't even click him at all to be our kadi in May. Tsk! (Updated:) Apparently, D's uncle said, Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar only open his booking slot, 3 months before the respective wedding date. I guess he must be that popular because Kadi is different from Naib Kadi and there is only 4 Kadi in Singapore and the rest are Naib Kadi. (A Kadi can marry a girl off with or without a wali but a Naib Kadi can only marry a girl off only with the presence of the wali.)

Yellow meaning he is available and Grey means he is not.

So, D told me to abandon the idea of getting Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar for our solemnization day since we need the registration to be done as soon as possible. And I had only one day, yes ONE DAY to think what I wanted for my Mas Kahwin because I never really put much thinking about this before. Tsk! So many decisions needed to be made. Initially, we wanted to do cash for Mas Kahwin but the definition of a Mas Kahwin,

Mas Kahwin: A Mahr is a gift from the groom to his bride after the solemnisation ceremony. The Mahr becomes her property and could not be spent on the husband. It could be in a form of cash, jewellery, gifts, car, house. The minimum amount for Mahr in Singapore is $100 cash.

 

I could not think of anything that will become my property and could not be spent on the husband that is worth $100, even if it's anything like bed set or anything else, confirm it will be more than $100 and I'm sure the husband will use it accidentally. Property such as handphone, FOR EXAMPLE, even if it's mine, it won't last and I won't get to keep it for long or for memory keepsake next time if I want to story-story to my children (like how Mama did). Haha! So I wanted something that will be my property and something that cannot be spent on my husband, that is literally a GIFT and keepsake for me. I told D, I wanted something that is in gold for my Mas Kahwin (one of the few first gold gift ever). Hehe!

Initially, I thought of my wedding band as the Mas Kahwin, yes, according to my friends, it can be in a form of Mas Kahwin and many actually took their wedding ring/band as the Mas Kahwin. In a way that D also won't have to spend unnecessarily as well. I totally love the idea of a gold ring (which is also my sister's Mas Kahwin) but it doesn't compliment my engagement ring since my engagement ring is in White. White diamong ring & Gold wedding band?  So, D suggested to get me 1 White Wedding Band to compliment my engagement ring and 1 Gold Ring for the Mas Kahwin. And then I realized I want to become what? Makcik-makcik rock or what, so many rings left & right. Hahaha! Can you just imagine on that solemnization day, D sarung me 2 rings, left and right. HAHAHAHA! Omigod. I cannot.

Then D suggested to get me a gold necklace instead but I don't like to wear necklace, furthermore, I'll be wearing a hijab on my solemnization day, so putting a necklace on me is like...a bit difficult, the tudung all. D suggested a gold anklet next since I LOVE anklet but, I snap and lose my anklet too many times, (the reason why I get fake silver). So that is out of the question, no gold anklet. And can you imagine him putting on the anklet on me after our solemnization. Hahahaha! I raise my leg for him to put on the anklet. Hahaha! We India mari ah?

Then in that short period of time, I just told D, get me a bangle instead. D didn't suggest that initially because I always had my Pandora on, but he agreed and said that will be the next best choice. I was texting my sister updating her on our ROMM registration part and she was like, "Bangle ke bracelet? Bangle macam india-india pakai tau." And spam me pictures of...

Bangle

 

VS

 

Bracelet

 

Hahaha! I don't know why we keep associating Indian cultures but as far as possible I want to keep my wedding as Malay as possible. I didn't mention the word as Islam as possible because sadly, nowadays, not many people do their wedding as Islamic as possible because like they always say, in religion (Islam) wise, getting married is easy (just nikah) but culture (Malay) always make it difficult. So, there you go, a bracelet for my mas kahwin.

And the next stressful part is CHOOSING & DECIDING on the kadi or naib kadi and your solemnization timing. The easiest way to do it (when you know your solemnization date & time) is to click on your 'preferred date' first and then it will bring you to the next page for you to choose your 'preferred time' for your solemnization timing. Then all the kadi that is available on your preferred date and time will be shown on the drop down menu bar. Unless you die-die want a certain kadi for your solemnization, then you can go about choosing the preferred kadi first and get married on the date that he is available from.

Of course I am not getting married at 10pm. Hahaha! This is just an example.

And sadly, we have to do it earlier and now. The nearer to the wedding, the better choice of kadi you'll probably will have (depends on luck) because certain kadi haven't open up their slot for booking yet but some opened earlier and got chope too soon already. Lol! The last time D and I checked last year, we had all these kadi & naib kadi available,

Abdul Aziz Bin Mohamed
Maarof Bin Haji Mohamad
Mohamad Yazid Bin Yunos
Mohamad Yusof Bin Sa'ad
Mohammad Irwan Shah Bin Sudiman
Mokson Bin Mahori
Muhamad Nuzhan Bin Abdul Halim
Noor Bin Rawi
Sofyan Bin Mohd Yadi
Ya'acob Bin Ishak
Ziyaudeen Ahmed BIn Sirajuddeen

And yesterday we checked,

Maarof Bin Haji Mohamad, Mohamad Yazid Bin Yunos, Noor Bin Rawi got taken already and wasn't available anymore. But there was 2 new naib kadi available this time and it was, Husin Bin Adam and Muhammad Ma'az Bin Sallim. Anyway, we didn't finish the registration part yesterday because D wanted to confirm with his uncle again regarding kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar. So I screen shot the available kadi I have on my solemnization time & date and I went to google videos of all the kadi. LOL!

So here is all my Naib Kadi.

1) Ustaz Abdul Aziz Bin Mohamed

 

2) Ustaz Mohammad Irwan Shah Bin Sudiman

 

3) Ustaz Husin Bin Adam

 

4) Ustaz Mohamad Yusof Bin Sa'ad

5) Ustaz Sofyan Bin Mohd Yadi

6) Ustaz Muhammad Ma'az Bin Sallim

And in just one day, Kadi Yusof Bin Sa'ad has already been booked today. Sadly not all the kadi pictures nor videos were available, which I did try to search high and low for it. I still have 5 other naib kadi as an option to choose from,

Mokson Bin Mahori
Muhammad Nuzhan Bin Abdul Halim
Ya'acob Bin Ishak
Ziyaudeen Ahmed Bin Sirajudeen
Mohamad Yusop Bin Hassim

So I cannot make do of their faces or how they actually go about doing the solemnization process. To me the wedding takhliq is the most important thing before and after the solemnization. Some Ustaz can deliver it in a way when you listen, you feel so loved, touches your heart and sometimes can even make you want to cry and make you want to fulfil your responsibility of husband and wife duly because of Allah SWT and you want to be able to love & care for each other because of Allah SWT till jannah.

Anyway, D told me that his uncle next option was to get us Kadi Pasuni Bin Maulan (since we cannot get hold of Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar) and I remember telling myself before how nice will it be that 34 years ago, the same kadi that marry my parents off, is now marrying me off. Heh! But seeing the Kadi face a bit fierce ah, my poor fiancé... HAHAHA! He is already not a social person, shy and is already nervous enough to do the solemnization at the void deck with a lot of people looking, so I decided to get the "chillax" kind of kadi for him. Hehehe!

Besides, it was the same kadi that my bestfriend engaged during her wedding 3 years ago and I guess a lot of people is quite familiar with him. Heeeee! Plus I don't know for some reason, I've always picture that one day when I get married, it is this kadi who will do my solemnization and I've once told Mama about it before that if I were to get married one day, I wanted it to be this kadi. Even, when D's uncle (who is also our witness) plan to book a kadi for us I was secretly wishing that I got this kadi.

On second option I don't mind Kadi Ismail Bin Terimoh but he is not available on my solemnization date and I don't mind Kadi Hassan Bin Salim too but he can be quite lengthy but I love his taqhlik and the way how he carry out the nikah. I even showed D the video of Kadi Hassan Bin Salim and he was like, forget it, it will make him more nervous. Lol! But it's okay because we got the kadi I wanted too. I was so afraid that somebody else would have booked him already but Alhamdulilah we got him. Apparently, D's uncle also said that he know this kadi too when he mentioned it to his uncle. (His uncle macam semua kadi dia kenal je.)

I guess from the video it's an easy guess already who is my chosen kadi.

I choose you, kadi! Okay, or rather, Tok Kadi, WE choose you! Hehehehehe! And talking about witness, the saksi, my BIL, Ressal will be my saksi on my wedding day. Till I write again. Tired lah write very long entry today & googling all those videos.

XOXO,

Princess Azie Anni ♥

Happy 2017, everybody!

Dear Diary,

I know it's a bit late but,

Happy New Year 2017 to you, myself and everybody else.

Looking back at those years, I cannot imagine how I have actually come this far when it comes to relationship. For me, relationship are the hardest to control or fathom out what's the future is going to be like because it involves another person's feeling, effort and love to make things work. In comparison to your job, your life, your education, mostly you are on your own to make it work or to break it at your own accord. You want to excel in education or your job? You work hard. You want to have more money? You work extra hard, take up another job something like that. You want to improve your life condition, your health? You work something out, you exercise and stuff like that. But relationship, it is just not about you. It involves another person. It's about you and him, you and her. It requires both effort. Sometimes, you may work hard, put effort into your relationship but if your partner don't, nothing will ever work out. You feel unappreciated, you feel like you've been taken for granted and you cannot be happy. You just cannot be happy alone in a relationship. Relationship means you are happy TOGETHER, not alone. So the ONLY way for you to make a relationship work is doing your part by putting effort AND at the same time, doa, doa, doa and ask from Allah SWT. Yes, you may not be in control of another person's feeling but Allah SWT is. And know that whatever your prayers is, He listens, He answers them. Sometimes, it may not be in a form of what you want but definitely in a form of what you need.

I have failed in a long-term relationship and I remember how I used to give up in the idea of marriage or even meeting anyone new, until D came along. Even that, with him, we failed in the earlier part of the relationship and I thought I will never get married, that nobody will ever love me in this life and I will never get to plan my own wedding etc like how Bella & Edward love life is, how they get married. *Hint*

But Syukur Alhamdulilah, I am going to now. Insyaallah.

The past may hurt but if it isn't because of the past, both D and I won't be what we both are now. I cannot describe what I've been put through all those years FIGHTING for what I have to fight for. My love life wasn't as smooth sailing as some other girl's fairy tales was. Tahajjud after Tahajjud, so many tears shed on my prayers mat, the sejadah, which only He knows. And Alhamdulilah! Allah SWT answered my prayers. I know I speak like an alien language, beating around the bush that nobody would understand what I'm trying to express but it's okay because some things in life are meant to be left unknown and kept between you and your partner and Him. All I just wanted to say was that, I went through so much pain & suffering, that I hope my children doesn't have to go through such painful love story either. But when I look back, if it wasn't because of the pain we feel or we had to go through, we might not come to realization and change to be what we are now.

I don't have anything much to say for 2017 since I am still quite the same. I did not take up any new course, I did not continue my education (still the same stuck in my honours degree), did not try any new hobbies or activities. I didn't do much for 2016 like how I have been my adventurous self for the past few years, doing Muay Thai etc etc. 2016 are just filled with preparations after preparations for the engagement and the upcoming wedding, Insyaallah.

And a shout-out to my fiancé, thank you for making out alive after few years with me. Hehehe! But thank you for still being the best person in my life. Thank you for always making me the happiest, for always giving in to me, to please me. Thank you for giving up many things that I don't like just to make me happy & make me feel at ease. Thank you for wanting to be with me, to marry me, for accepting me for who I am, what I am, in terms of my best and my worse, my perfections and my imperfections. Thank you for always promising me, that you'll take good care of me and wanting to change my life for the better when we get married. Thank you for wiping my tears when I cry because things get rough and trying to make everything okay and calm things down. Thank you for always working hard so that I don't feel less about everything else. Thank you for always advising me to be a better person in life.

There is nothing more that I pray and I hope that for us to be happily married, to always treasure and love each other because of Allah SWT and for us to continue reminding and to guide each other in Allah's ways. Insyaallah. Amin.

---

I ever ask myself before what did I do so bad in life to deserve someone like him. Lol! But for everything that he is changed now, it can never be compared to what he was before. Maybe that was the reason why I came after, in his life and not before. Besides, everyone deserve a second chance and Allah SWT probably wants me to learn to let go & learn to forgive something which it was drill into me since young and which I grew up with, to be unforgivable. But there is no bigger mistake that is unforgivable if He himself can forgive. Masyaallah. I learn many things about being with this man. Things which I think I couldn't but I did. That we shouldn't judge anyone less.

Syukur Alhamdulilah for all the life lesson.

Till here.

XOXO,

Princess Azie Anni ♥

150 To Date.

Dear Diary,

150 days to date or minus days left.

It's pretty hard when you don't have so much help around you. At this moment, there are many things that are still left unsettled for me.

And I find it harder and even harder as the days got nearer. I dread my wedding preparations and there are times I just want to run away & disappear, never to see anyone else. I've been warned by many BTBs before and I know I am not going through these things alone. Many BTBs have mentioned to me that they have faced the same or about the same situation as me before. But the fact, their parents were there and everyone else were there.

Mama has always been the one that managed everything for the family and is very understanding about my situation. Ayah on the other hand is good at ordering his way around but rarely help or even know how to help. The wedding is all on me and since it's getting nearer I could not spare enough for my own wedding, and D is working hard, OT after OT tremendously. I'm not lying if I say that we do not quarrel. D is human too, working OT means he gets tired easily and rarely get to spend enough time with me. Which also means I feel neglected most of the time, especially when I needed him to be with me to discuss and settle all the wedding preparations.

I feel so pressure that I realized I have been losing my patience and temper a bit too easily, a bit too much lately. I became very much petty over little tiny things and it gets me annoyed. And at this time too, I discovered many things that I think...could meddle with my trust and I became more and more vulnerable, more and more insecure. I don't trust so much most of the time. The last time I heard, well for the many times I've seen how, when someone trust so much, in the end their trust consumed them over things that they never picture that could have happened but it happened. So I became very careful yet sometimes I could not even explain myself.

But then again, I never have to feel, or care or face about this kind of things before. But I do not know why all these feelings started to make its presence and appearance just before the wedding. So much so, it's taking a toll on my life and my emotions. Sometimes I wished to just don't care but it's hard because all these revolves around my life - and will be carried to the future. I hope this is just a wedding kind of trials & obstacles, no more after that, hopefully.

Fairytale wedding never exist do they?

  

Finally booked the wedding venue for my side yesterday. Syukur Alhamdulilah! D and I actually went down 2 weeks ago to book the Multi-Purpose Hall (MPH) for my side but they told us the booking is not open yet till yesterday.  And my side used to be under the Choa Chu Kang Town Council before but recently we were split under the Yew Tee-Marsiling Town Council continent. The last time booking for a void deck for wedding, all you needed was just to produce your IC and you're good to go. That was what happened for D, since his place is still under the old Town Council - Bukit Panjang Town Council, thus booking the void deck was super easy, that even his mom could do it for him. But on the other hand, I went through so much difficulty.

Yew Tee-Marsiling Town Council - They needed me to produce the ROMM approval letter (but their website stated ROM and not even ROMM letter) Seriously, this part is a bit too.....zzzzz. They don't realized ROMM and ROM are 2 different processes and decisions are involved in here. Yes, it may be 4 months plus from now to our wedding but D and I haven't even decide yet on the solemnization time and which naib kadi we would like to choose (which ROM doesn't require for any naib kadi decision. Duh!) for our wedding. I don't even know which kadi is who for now.

And registering into the portal means you have to decide all these already and make the ROMM administration payment which cost $39. Yes, $39 may be cheap to some but for us who is cash-tight, it's a lot. And they'll charge you again if you make any last minute changes to the registration. At the same time, you also have to confirm your solemnization venue when registering for ROMM, which in my case it is held at my MPH itself. Let's just say we already wrote down the MPH for the solemnization venue, registered and made the ROMM payment but when we go down to the Town Council, we don't get to book the void deck because someone else have already booked it before us. This means we have to make amends on the ROMM registration, which means we have to pay for the amendment changes as well. And is the Town Council going to pay me for that?

The Town Council keep warning me that the void deck is based on a first-come-first serve basis. Yah duh! I know. That's the reason why I wanted to book it earlier but they die-die wanted me to produce the ROMM approval letter when we don't even get to book the venue yet. I think it's only right, if after knowing I am successful in booking the venue, then can I do my ROMM process, correct? Haiz! If I know this kind of thing would have happened, I would have done my wedding elsewhere like at Royal Palm or Desa Kartika or anywhere else. But of course, my dad would not want it. He still love the idea of gotong-royong and rewang kind of kampong wedding feeling at the void deck kind. But after much exchanges of words, they finally approved my booking for the MPH, but I have to come back in a month's time from now to produce the ROMM approval letter.  After the successful in booking the venue, I made the deposit plus the extra charges for booking the MPH inclusive of the electricity and water usage bills too. And I guess this time, D and I have to finally decide on our solemnization time and who we want our naib kadi to be. I have never thought I would have to register for ROMM this early by January 2017 next month, always thought I wanted to do it somewhere next year but in February or March but I guess....Kita yang merancang, Allah SWT yang tentukan.

But well, lucky they finally did approve my booking for the venue. Alhamdulilah! Or else I would have wasted twice of my annual leave for this thingy. Plus, the place is so far from my house, all the way at Marsiling and it's like so farrrrr to walk to the Town Council office. Zzz!

Till here.

I am very stressed up currently that I am having heart palpitations now & then, I have been vomiting after consuming my food, my stomach feels very uneasy each time of the day, I get agitated & annoyed easily, I cry without realizing and I have been having such throbbing headaches. Haiz!

I missed my old self.

What has one wedding done to me?

Like D always try to encouraged me,

"We will persevere okay. I will help you in whatever ways I can. We are already in our last lap, the final hurdle, we can do this together. Once the wedding is over, we can chill, relax and be happy together."

Insyaallah.

But what he doesn't realized, things never get easier as we grow older. More and more responsibility, more and more problems, more and more things to think about, to decide on too. Think about yourself now and 10 years back when you were in school, Polytechnic etc, the ONLY stress you probably have or your so called MAJOR stress was about school; projects, exams or maybe money for some. But now you have bigger responsibility, bigger stress, bigger decision. Nevermind, let my fiancé have the benefit of the doubt for now, his own doubt. Tsk.

XOXO,

Princess Azie Anni ♥ 

Kasih Sejati, SuChi Success Day 2

Dear Diary,

Day 2:- 11 December 2016

This time D woke me up with his countless text and missed call to wake me up so that I will not be late. I woke up on time too and got myself ready and since we were quite early, we took the public.

And early in the morning, D had to spoil my mood. It all started because the night before, his family and him were discussing about his venue déco. I asked him certain questions and he could answer me and it got me annoyed. I felt like he wasn't much involved about the wedding preparations but leaving everything to his parents to decide this and that. Who's wedding is it anyway?  So he showed me some of the deco (probably trying to prove to me lah that he is being initiative.)

The moment I saw, it was totally off the list. I am very particular about certain things, the deco being one of it. So, when he showed me these 2 deco, obviously I went "Noooo!" The fact is, I am also going to sit at the pelamin okay. This pelamin is like..........I don't even want to say it. Faham-faham je lah eh. I can be as easy going and sembarang 99% of the time but when I am particular about something, I will...be....very......particular. Even for the Kompang (which sadly I didn't get to choose) since it comes under his catering package and they don't even know what is their kompang company called. I told D if the kompang is not up to my expectation, you know like some kompang can really kompang like the berterabuh kind, I don't want to move.  Hahaha!

 

 

So obviously not this two. D showed me some more deco and I was okay with some and I went to their fb and suggested him somemore of their deco. Well, as long as it's not Gold and Red, even though Red is my favourite colour but the colour combination is a no-no. Ni Malay wedding eh bukan.......

 

 

My favourite was this one obviously but,

Wasn't D's favourite but it's okay, any other deco but not gold and red. Moving on due to this topic, D mentioned something which kinda hurt my feelings.

D: Oh yes. My dad kata, bilang dengan bakal kau, jangan pakai baju terdedah sana, terdedah sini nanti.

I know the intention was good and of course, I am aware of the things I can and cannot wear during a Malay wedding reception. Of course, I won't wear those bustier dress even though I really wanted to but I know I have to respect the makcik & pakcik there. So, I'm getting something a little more covered but hopefully with lace kinda. Then like that also cannot. Furthermore, it's my wedding. My wedding! If I can't be happy on my wedding with EVERYONE TELLING ME WHAT TO DO and EVERYONE SAYING WHAT IS THEIR WANT BUT NOT LISTENING TO WHAT I WANT, THEN why am I getting married in the first place?! And if my wedding is being plan and control by other people, then why is it even call MY wedding?

So I didn't talk to D, I kept quiet until we reached the class.

The class started with Puan Suriati on Module 7 & 8 since I think Encik Khair was busy with something else again and so we skipped Module 5 & 6 at the later part.

Module 7:-

• Asas-asas Komunikasi
• Komunikasi Lelaki & Perempuan
• Bahasa Cinta
• Tips Komunikasi Berkesan

Module 8:-

• Konflik & Resolusi
• Kemaafan
• House Rules
• Nota Kasih Sejati

I love how this class too. It's really more of interacting between you and your partner. Puan Suriati made us exchange our books even more compared to yesterday's modules. Thus, the boys were made to shift place and sat at the same row as where their partner is sitting, so it will be easier to exchange books. In module 7, we learn about our 'Bahasa Cinta' more of what we call your 'Love Language'. It consist of..

1) Words of Affirmation
2) Acts of Service
3) Receiving Gifts
4) Quality Time
5) Physical Touch

I remembered doing this like 2 years ago and I was more of the Quality Time and D was the Words of Affirmation and this time when I did it again, SURPRISINGLY, D was Quality Time and guess what was mine? Physical Touch. HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Faz, sitting next to me chuckled seeing mine. So we were told to exchange our book with our partner. Most of the guys had Physical Touch (of course) and girls had Quality Time or Words of Affirmation as their Love Language. So, D upon seeing mine being the physical touch, he just gulped down his saliva hard and stared at me at the corner of his seat in disbelieve. Hahahahahaa! I wanted to change to something else but no matter how much I changed it, it was still Physical Touch. Gatal nah ke aku? Lol!

So Puan Suriati mentioned that our love language might change over time. Like now maybe we might prefer Receiving Gifts but sometimes after marriage, we might prefer Acts of Service rather. We had our tea break and D kept making fun of me about the 'Physical Touch'. I can't deny the fact that MOST of the time, all I do is to touch him. Okay please don't get me wrong. Not anyhow touch-touch lah okay. I just like to tickle or poke-poke him that's all and makes him "frustrated." LOL!

The class ended on a sweet note.

It taught us to always forgive each other at the end of the day and include Islamic verses and quotes to love one another. Even as I'm writing this, I feel like crying. I remember Puan Suriati mentioned, the best couples are the ones that forgive each other before they sleep (something which D and I try to practice and hopefully continue to practice.) There are some people who fought with each other and who knows God take their partner's life away and fighting with each other only cause you greater regrets then. And Puan Suriati mentioned 'Percayalah. Jodoh kita itu adalah yang sebaik-baiknya pilihan untuk kita dari Allah SWT. Hormati lah dia, hargai lah dia, pelihara lah dia dan sayangi lah dia seperti mana anda mengenggam sebutir mutiara yang tinggi nilainya.' So we were told to write a note to each other on a heart shaped paper and then to exchange at the end of the class before heading for our lunch.

Went for our lunch break and this time we had Nasi Briyani. It was super nice and this time D and I finished our food. Lol!

Screenshot from my Insta video.

After our lunch, we continued our next lesson of Module 5 & 6 (supposedly) by Encik Khair. Encik Khair has a unique way of teaching. He doesn't really go book by book but explain and recap everything that we need to know in general & in-depth at the end of the day of life after marriage. His class is so much fun, we laugh even more and had more interaction games. He does not only cover the aspect on life after marriage but include unsur-unsur agama into it.

 

 

D had the easiest position lah eh. Haha! The twister spinner doesn't want to cooperate with me but keep giving D the easiest pose. Lol! Anyway, this game taught us that life after marriage will not always be smooth-sailing (considered ours was. Insyaallah. Amin). Like how complicated these positions are, that will be how tough marriage life can be, but what most important is we overcome them together.

We had our tea breaks and continued the lesson, this time understanding the difference of how girls and boys differ in emotion wise.

We ended the lesson half an hour later and even so, I don't wish for the class to end. I made new friends and I love how interesting the class were. We were then told to write our feedback/surveys before leaving, at the same time Encik Khair called the boys name to give our our certificate in completion of the pre-marriage course.

I will DEFINITELY recommend Kasih Sejati by SuChi Success to any BTB & GTB out there. It's worth the money and time. It's fun and you'll learn so much more and it's definitely something different from any other pre-marriage course I've heard from any BTB & GTB that doesn't touch much about this or that aspect that was being feedback by them. It's a feeling I cannot explain after attending this course after numerous times of exchanging book with D. It's something I will remember for the rest of our lives being married together and hopefully to incorporate them into our daily life after this.

If some of you are introvert. Don't worry, you can also attend this course. It's not so much about interacting every time. The interaction part is slightly little only, most of the time you'll just sit down, listen to the instructor and exchanging books with your partner. If you don't feel comfortable to interact, you can just keep quiet like I did (but became slightly talkative before the lesson end. Hehe!) Don't need to worry. D is more of the introvert kind, he dislike making friends and meeting new people but he survived. Hehe!

So, to experience what I experience and to understand what I meant, sign up for your pre-marriage course by Kasih Sejati by SuChi Success okay?

Link:-

 

http://www.kasihsejati.com/ks/web/page.asp?topic=208

XOXO,

Princess Azie Anni ♥

Kasih Sejati, SuChi Success Day 1

Dear Diary,

First and for all I would like to apologize for all my language, vocabulary and grammar constructions that sounds pretty horrible whenever I blog. Lol! The reason being, I always don't realized that I made those mistakes not until I press 'publish' and re-read again what I've written the next day or the next day after. By then, I can't be bothered to correct them since I need to use a laptop (cannot use handphone, keep hanging and shut down) to log into blogger. But sometimes, when I have the free time, I usually do the change (by then people have already read my entry.) Furthermore, I usually blogged during late night and I'm already half-sleepy and rushing to get the entry published. LOL! Plus plus, I myself is aware that my English is not so good anyway. So thank you for bearing all my ugly vocabs people.  Hehehe!

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Last weekend, D and I attended our pre-marriage course for 2 straight days from 9am-6pm by SuChi Success, Kasih Sejati.

Since D is on 2 weeks leave, so we decided to settle the pre-marriage course this month. Besides his shift job doesn't allow him to do a full straight course back to back like this especially on a weekends plus some of my friends suggested to do the pre-marriage course 6 months prior to our wedding and obviously both of us have less than 6 months time left before our wedding day.

Our course was held at SuChi Success Training Centre itself. Take note that different days/week of the pre-marriage course will be held at different venue sometimes. It could be the training centre itself or at a mosque, so choose accordingly to your preferred date and venue.

Since mine was held at SuChi Success Training Centre, it's not necessary to put on the tudung compared to having it in the mosque (of course compulsory) but I think it's only appropriate to do so since it was stated in the e-mail for ladies to preferably put on the hijab.

Day 1:- 10 December 2016

We were told to report half an hour earlier at 8.30am for the registration but I woke up like an hour late because I slept quite late the night before (My auntie & family plus Adik & family was over at my place and left quite late.) D didn't even wake me up! He thought I was getting ready and that was why I didn't text him at all. 7.30am - I jumped out from my bed and quickly had my shower. I hate missing fajr prayers whenever I'm late but I had to because I was already running late.

I tried to call for cab but NO CABS! I even tried Uber, tried Grabcar, Grab Taxi. Seriously or what?! By then I was super annoyed because we were left with less than an hour to reach from the West all the way to the East. SuChi Success Training Centre is located at Paya Lebar, mind you.

I decided to give up on the cab and left home to flag for the taxi at the bus stop, and again... No sign of cab but the bus came instead. So I took the bus and headed to Lot 1's Taxi Stand hoping to get a cab. There was a queue at the taxi stand but no cab were available. Good job CCK!  I was pretty annoyed because by then it was already 8.15am. So, D called me to board the LRT to his place in Bukit Panjang since he said, the Expressway there leads to Paya Lebar much faster. And so I did, I took the LRT and met him at his area. Both of us tried Grabcar and guess what?! Both of us got a cab!  D cancelled his grab car and used mine instead since mine was a grab taxi. (Afraid grab car drivers don't know their way around and we will be wasting time).

 I was furious, angry because I dislike being late. D tried to calm me down inside the cab. He kept saying that it was not my fault that I was late and it's really no used getting upset, getting angry because it won't change anything. He took his phone and check his GPRS and showed me that we will reach the venue just nice by 9am, before the course start and held my hand tight to calm me down. Haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. He always seems to know what to do whenever I get upset, I get angry just like Mama.  Made me miss Mama.

D was right, we reached by 9am and we rushed to the training centre at the 4th floor by stairs because we couldn't find the lift. Hahaha! We registered ourselves and we were given a cute cat pen and a book each for the lesson.

I saw the registration paper and apparently, there was another couple that was later than us. (So we didn't feel that bad) Sat inside the room and we were separated into one side female and male (but in the same room.) Those who came early were lucky because they get to sit near their partner separated by just a small middle alley but D and I were quite far apart. I sat at the 5th row which is the last row, 2nd sit from the middle alley and D sat at the 3rd row, 3rd sit from the middle alley. But I could see him from where I sat but slightly difficult for him to see me, since he have to turn back to his left in order to see me. Hehehe!

The instructor/trainer came and started the course after the both of us took our place. Flipped into the book and they have from Module 1 all the way to Module 8 or Chapters in my own words. I'm not sure how they usually run the course but ours weren't in sequence on that day. We jumped in between Module because apparently, the trainer Encik Khair couldn't be present early in the morning to run the Module 1 & 2 for us. And the lesson is of course conducted in Malay and a mixture of English but mostly Malay, so some people there, probably English spoken at home, (I don't know how difficult can Malay language be hard to understand if you are Malay. They don't use difficult Malay language)  said they find the lesson hard to understand because they don't understand Malay. K.

The Module is as per follow:-

Module 1:-

• Konsep Keserasian
• Profil Personaliti
• Analisa Personaliti
• Komitmen Terhadap Perkahwinan

Module 2:-

• Konsep Keluarga Asal
• Mengenal Bakal Mentua & Keluarga Pasangan
• Profil Kewangan Pra-Nikah
• Rancangan Pernikahan

Module 3:-

• Pengertian Nikah
• Syarat & Rukun Nikah
• Konsep Taalik
• Tanggungjawab Suami & Isteri
• Konsep Nafkah
• Sunnah Dalam Nikah

Module 4:-

• Erti Cinta, Kasih & Sayang
• Konsep Nafsu
• Seks & Intimasi
• Adab-adab Seks

Module 5:-

• Tekanan-tekanan Awal Perkahwinan
• Konsep Perubahan & Penyesuaian
• Tahap-tahap Emosi
• Membuat Keputusan
• Menghadapi Perubahan & Membuat Penyesuaian

Module 6:-

• Kepimpinan Keluarga
• Isu Zuriat
• Profil Kewangan Selepas Nikah
• Keperluan Kewangan Keluarga

Module 7:-

• Asas-asas Komunikasi
• Komunikasi Lelaki & Perempuan
• Bahasa Cinta
• Tips Komunikasi Berkesan

Module 8:-

• Konflik & Resolusi
• Kemaafan
• House Rules
• Nota Kasih Sejati

So we started with Module 3 & 4 first with Ustaz Jalil as our trainer and he was very good. So firstly, it was the ice-breaker part. We were told to get to know at least 3 new person (if you don't go for the course with friends) in the class and to remember their name. So in a row there was at least 5 people. I turned to my right and got to know this girl call Suzannah and my left was this girl call Fazanah (called her Faz) by short which I became closer to her during the course, Surprisingly, at the same row it was my own Primary school friend, Farhana and poly friend, Aisyah. LOL! And then we were told to remember another 3 names, this time the front row turned to the back and I got to know Suhaila and Mista and....I couldn't remember what was the other girl name that sat in front of me. LOL!

Module 3:-

• Pengertian Nikah
• Syarat & Rukun Nikah
• Konsep Taalik
• Tanggungjawab Suami & Isteri
• Konsep Nafkah
• Sunnah Dalam Nikah

Module 4:-

• Erti Cinta, Kasih & Sayang
• Konsep Nafsu
• Seks & Intimasi
• Adab-adab Seks 

The lesson started soon after. Ustaz Jalil asked us on what was our definition of nikah and told us to write in the book. And after which, he told us to WhatsApp our definition to our partner. Krik krik krik! I don't want to WhatsApp D because I felt uncomfortable to share him my thoughts but...his WhatsApp came in and so I WhatsApp him back mine. HEHEHE!

Mine

His

And I didn't know I was getting married to a doctor. Half the time I couldn't figure out what he actually write.

So all in all, we learn about nafkah too, who is solely responsible for the nafkah of the family after marriage etc. (Fact: Husband of course!) And what to do before the akad nikah. Like to perform your 2 rakaat solat sunat, to ask for forgiveness from your parents, and to selawat before leaving your house all the way before reaching the solemnization venue. And to perform 2 rakaat solat sunat after the solemnization, and the husband is encouraged to place his hand on his wife forehead while reading some doa that was taught during the course. (We were made to memorize. Hehe!)

The lesson carried on for Module 3 with Ustaz Jalil with tea break in between and then Module 4 before we head for our lunch break. Module 4 is of course about sex which of course some of the boys were being naughty...;aughing half the time in the class.  But...Ustaz Jalil include the appropriateness of doing sex etc. And what I like about this module is the doa that was taught and we were made to memorize them during class. Yesss, we are not animals and as husband and wife, sex is an ibadat actually, not something to be made funny of. Thus, of course prayers and doa have to be read in order for syaitan or jin not to "bother/join" us. It touches my heart what I learn about marriage in Islamic context. So much love. :)

After which we headed for our break. Sadly I didn't take a picture of the food but we had Nasi Sambal Goreng and Begedil with Lemak Cili Api Chicken. They were so generous with the portion that even D and I couldn't finish ours. Hehe! The boys proceed with their Zohor prayers and some of the girls too but I didn't. =X I know. I always seems to feel a bit uncomfortable to solat anywhere if it's not home or the mosque.

Manage to screenshot from my Insta story video. Hehehe!

An hour later, we started our class again, this time it was a different instructor known as Encik Faizal, who cover Module 1 & 2 . I didn't know that different module was conducted by different instructor. By right, it was supposed to be Encik Khair but Encik Faizal said, Encik Khair had some last minute thing to attend to and so he had to take over.

Encik Faizal was okay in conducting the lesson but prolly it was quite some time that he conducted a lesson that he seems to be slightly blur, confused & less confident before we took our 2nd tea break, then he was pretty much better at conducting the lesson. I find learning module 1 quite interesting too.

Module 1:-

• Konsep Keserasian
• Profil Personaliti
• Analisa Personaliti
• Komitmen Terhadap Perkahwinan

We learn about of personality differences with our partner. Based on a few questions, we were told to answer and do the scoring and calculations. So different questions asked is divided into different categories such as your Anggur (Grape), Pisang (Banana), Oren (Orange) and Tembikai (Watermelon). During which in the lesson, they were many times we had to exchange book with our partner to compare etc. Hahaha! And the most highest score of these fruits, describe most our personality. I was more of the Anggur (my highest score) whereas D is more of the Pisang. Anggur is described to be someone who socialize and talk more whereas Pisang is more of the quieter and deep thinking ones. I had slightly score of Pisang, Oren and Tembikai as well but just Anggur being the highest but funny how D had ZERO score of anggur which really explain how much he doesn't like socializing at all. HAHAHA! So, they taught us how to "deal" and understand each other personality. Many times D exchange glances at me and shake his head in agreement to the instructor. Lol!

Module 2:-

• Konsep Keluarga Asal
• Mengenal Bakal Mentua & Keluarga Pasangan
• Profil Kewangan Pra-Nikah
• Rancangan Pernikahan

Continue with module 2 after our tea break and we learn ways on how to "deal" and understand each other's family. What are the do(s) and don't(s) and how do we overcome "conflict" or rather differences about each other's family. Because moving into each other's place will definitely be a culture "shock" to each one of us since we are all brought up differently. And again, we were told to exchange book with our partner to discuss and exchange ways on how we can overcome them. Hehe!
We ended the class on time at 6pm since the boys were making noises (boys as usual being boys) and Encik Faizal mentioned that tomorrow Encik Khair will be taking over the class and so we should really come on time in order to finish on time. Hehehehe!

Next entry for Day 2.....

XOXO,

Princess Azie Anni ♥