Tok Kadi, I choose you!

Dear Diary,

*Kadi name will is bold in this entry.

This time D and I had to get our ROMM registration done because I had to pass a copy of my ROMM approval letter to my Town Council before they come chasing after me or if they revoke my booking of my wedding venue. Frankly, I didn't know that choosing a kadi will somehow be this "hard" for us, especially when you are the kind who don't know which kadi is who and which kadi you actually like or prefer. Lol! I mean I recognize some of the kadi faces but I don't know their name, and the only Kadi's name I know is Pasuni Bin Maulan but I don't know how he looks like because he was the one that did the solemnization of Mama & Ayah. Heeeee!

Initially, we thought it will be easy since D's uncle knew one of the Kadi, Nor Razak Bin Bakar whom did the solemnization of D's brother, Sadiq & Maria, 2 years ago. D's parents even said they will help us settle the 'looking for the kadi' part. So, I thought it was one burden off my chest since I don't have to go around looking for kadi to marry me off. Lol!  But the true struggle happened when we wanted to register our ROMM, (not sure) but I think it's probably a new thing now. I guess last time you probably have to book & "outsource" for your own kadi, call them and ask them yourselves but now they have drop down tab like this,

This is just a list of almost all the kadi without choosing the preferred date.

asking us to make a choice in deciding which kadi we want during our solemnization day. So different kadi is available at different date, different timing base on their availability. D and I tried to skip choosing the kadi part (since we wanted Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar) and just click 'confirm' with the registration but they don't allow us to do that. And strangely, Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar block off all his calendar dates that we couldn't even click him at all to be our kadi in May. Tsk! (Updated:) Apparently, D's uncle said, Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar only open his booking slot, 3 months before the respective wedding date. I guess he must be that popular because Kadi is different from Naib Kadi and there is only 4 Kadi in Singapore and the rest are Naib Kadi. (A Kadi can marry a girl off with or without a wali but a Naib Kadi can only marry a girl off only with the presence of the wali.)

Yellow meaning he is available and Grey means he is not.

So, D told me to abandon the idea of getting Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar for our solemnization day since we need the registration to be done as soon as possible. And I had only one day, yes ONE DAY to think what I wanted for my Mas Kahwin because I never really put much thinking about this before. Tsk! So many decisions needed to be made. Initially, we wanted to do cash for Mas Kahwin but the definition of a Mas Kahwin,

Mas Kahwin: A Mahr is a gift from the groom to his bride after the solemnisation ceremony. The Mahr becomes her property and could not be spent on the husband. It could be in a form of cash, jewellery, gifts, car, house. The minimum amount for Mahr in Singapore is $100 cash.

 

I could not think of anything that will become my property and could not be spent on the husband that is worth $100, even if it's anything like bed set or anything else, confirm it will be more than $100 and I'm sure the husband will use it accidentally. Property such as handphone, FOR EXAMPLE, even if it's mine, it won't last and I won't get to keep it for long or for memory keepsake next time if I want to story-story to my children (like how Mama did). Haha! So I wanted something that will be my property and something that cannot be spent on my husband, that is literally a GIFT and keepsake for me. I told D, I wanted something that is in gold for my Mas Kahwin (one of the few first gold gift ever). Hehe!

Initially, I thought of my wedding band as the Mas Kahwin, yes, according to my friends, it can be in a form of Mas Kahwin and many actually took their wedding ring/band as the Mas Kahwin. In a way that D also won't have to spend unnecessarily as well. I totally love the idea of a gold ring (which is also my sister's Mas Kahwin) but it doesn't compliment my engagement ring since my engagement ring is in White. White diamong ring & Gold wedding band?  So, D suggested to get me 1 White Wedding Band to compliment my engagement ring and 1 Gold Ring for the Mas Kahwin. And then I realized I want to become what? Makcik-makcik rock or what, so many rings left & right. Hahaha! Can you just imagine on that solemnization day, D sarung me 2 rings, left and right. HAHAHAHA! Omigod. I cannot.

Then D suggested to get me a gold necklace instead but I don't like to wear necklace, furthermore, I'll be wearing a hijab on my solemnization day, so putting a necklace on me is like...a bit difficult, the tudung all. D suggested a gold anklet next since I LOVE anklet but, I snap and lose my anklet too many times, (the reason why I get fake silver). So that is out of the question, no gold anklet. And can you imagine him putting on the anklet on me after our solemnization. Hahahaha! I raise my leg for him to put on the anklet. Hahaha! We India mari ah?

Then in that short period of time, I just told D, get me a bangle instead. D didn't suggest that initially because I always had my Pandora on, but he agreed and said that will be the next best choice. I was texting my sister updating her on our ROMM registration part and she was like, "Bangle ke bracelet? Bangle macam india-india pakai tau." And spam me pictures of...

Bangle

 

VS

 

Bracelet

 

Hahaha! I don't know why we keep associating Indian cultures but as far as possible I want to keep my wedding as Malay as possible. I didn't mention the word as Islam as possible because sadly, nowadays, not many people do their wedding as Islamic as possible because like they always say, in religion (Islam) wise, getting married is easy (just nikah) but culture (Malay) always make it difficult. So, there you go, a bracelet for my mas kahwin.

And the next stressful part is CHOOSING & DECIDING on the kadi or naib kadi and your solemnization timing. The easiest way to do it (when you know your solemnization date & time) is to click on your 'preferred date' first and then it will bring you to the next page for you to choose your 'preferred time' for your solemnization timing. Then all the kadi that is available on your preferred date and time will be shown on the drop down menu bar. Unless you die-die want a certain kadi for your solemnization, then you can go about choosing the preferred kadi first and get married on the date that he is available from.

Of course I am not getting married at 10pm. Hahaha! This is just an example.

And sadly, we have to do it earlier and now. The nearer to the wedding, the better choice of kadi you'll probably will have (depends on luck) because certain kadi haven't open up their slot for booking yet but some opened earlier and got chope too soon already. Lol! The last time D and I checked last year, we had all these kadi & naib kadi available,

Abdul Aziz Bin Mohamed
Maarof Bin Haji Mohamad
Mohamad Yazid Bin Yunos
Mohamad Yusof Bin Sa'ad
Mohammad Irwan Shah Bin Sudiman
Mokson Bin Mahori
Muhamad Nuzhan Bin Abdul Halim
Noor Bin Rawi
Sofyan Bin Mohd Yadi
Ya'acob Bin Ishak
Ziyaudeen Ahmed BIn Sirajuddeen

And yesterday we checked,

Maarof Bin Haji Mohamad, Mohamad Yazid Bin Yunos, Noor Bin Rawi got taken already and wasn't available anymore. But there was 2 new naib kadi available this time and it was, Husin Bin Adam and Muhammad Ma'az Bin Sallim. Anyway, we didn't finish the registration part yesterday because D wanted to confirm with his uncle again regarding kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar. So I screen shot the available kadi I have on my solemnization time & date and I went to google videos of all the kadi. LOL!

So here is all my Naib Kadi.

1) Ustaz Abdul Aziz Bin Mohamed

 

2) Ustaz Mohammad Irwan Shah Bin Sudiman

 

3) Ustaz Husin Bin Adam

 

4) Ustaz Mohamad Yusof Bin Sa'ad

5) Ustaz Sofyan Bin Mohd Yadi

6) Ustaz Muhammad Ma'az Bin Sallim

And in just one day, Kadi Yusof Bin Sa'ad has already been booked today. Sadly not all the kadi pictures nor videos were available, which I did try to search high and low for it. I still have 5 other naib kadi as an option to choose from,

Mokson Bin Mahori
Muhammad Nuzhan Bin Abdul Halim
Ya'acob Bin Ishak
Ziyaudeen Ahmed Bin Sirajudeen
Mohamad Yusop Bin Hassim

So I cannot make do of their faces or how they actually go about doing the solemnization process. To me the wedding takhliq is the most important thing before and after the solemnization. Some Ustaz can deliver it in a way when you listen, you feel so loved, touches your heart and sometimes can even make you want to cry and make you want to fulfil your responsibility of husband and wife duly because of Allah SWT and you want to be able to love & care for each other because of Allah SWT till jannah.

Anyway, D told me that his uncle next option was to get us Kadi Pasuni Bin Maulan (since we cannot get hold of Kadi Nor Razak Bin Bakar) and I remember telling myself before how nice will it be that 34 years ago, the same kadi that marry my parents off, is now marrying me off. Heh! But seeing the Kadi face a bit fierce ah, my poor fiancé... HAHAHA! He is already not a social person, shy and is already nervous enough to do the solemnization at the void deck with a lot of people looking, so I decided to get the "chillax" kind of kadi for him. Hehehe!

Besides, it was the same kadi that my bestfriend engaged during her wedding 3 years ago and I guess a lot of people is quite familiar with him. Heeeee! Plus I don't know for some reason, I've always picture that one day when I get married, it is this kadi who will do my solemnization and I've once told Mama about it before that if I were to get married one day, I wanted it to be this kadi. Even, when D's uncle (who is also our witness) plan to book a kadi for us I was secretly wishing that I got this kadi.

On second option I don't mind Kadi Ismail Bin Terimoh but he is not available on my solemnization date and I don't mind Kadi Hassan Bin Salim too but he can be quite lengthy but I love his taqhlik and the way how he carry out the nikah. I even showed D the video of Kadi Hassan Bin Salim and he was like, forget it, it will make him more nervous. Lol! But it's okay because we got the kadi I wanted too. I was so afraid that somebody else would have booked him already but Alhamdulilah we got him. Apparently, D's uncle also said that he know this kadi too when he mentioned it to his uncle. (His uncle macam semua kadi dia kenal je.)

I guess from the video it's an easy guess already who is my chosen kadi.

I choose you, kadi! Okay, or rather, Tok Kadi, WE choose you! Hehehehehe! And talking about witness, the saksi, my BIL, Ressal will be my saksi on my wedding day. Till I write again. Tired lah write very long entry today & googling all those videos.

XOXO,

Princess Azie Anni ♥